Five Reasons Tom Hiddleston should be cast as Theon Greyjoy

Image I decided, after the terrible earnestness of my last post, to do something fun and light (if not any less earnest). So I’m going to present you five reasons why my favourite actor in the world should have played my favourite character in Westeros. If you agree with me by the end of this post, join me in writing a strongly-worded letter to David Benioff and D.B. Weiss, the showrunners of HBO’s Game of Thrones.

Alternately, you could recommend me to Buzzfeed. Kthanx.

Tom Hiddleston is on his way to becoming a household name, thanks to his stint as Loki in the Marvel franchise. The beauty of Tom lies not only in his flawless portrayal of a malcontent demi-god, but his ability to quote Shakespeare on demand and bring to life quasi-historical figures like Henry V. And have you heard him read poetry?

Basically, I think Tom could play anyone. And the idea of him playing Theon? Exquisite.

1)      He knows how to be annoyingly sassy

 This was one of the first things that I liked about Theon. He’s smart and good looking and he knows it, and that drives people crazy. He takes risks and gets berated for it; recall how he shot the wildling holding Bran in A Game of Thrones and got yelled at by Robb for his hasty action. And his ever-present smirk-smile gives Jon and Ramsay both the heebie-jeebies. Ramsay retaliates by smashing his teeth, ensuring that Theon isn’t going to be smiling prettily anymore.

 And we all know that Tom can do a damn good smirk.

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Oh, yeah.

 

2)      He knows his way with a weapon

 Having played Shakespeare’s Henry V and Captain Nicholls in War Horse, Tom presumably knows his way around a battlefield. He’s done some swordplay and can swing a blade as well as Alfie Allen, I would assume, if not better. And yes, I know Theon uses a bow and arrow. Can’t you just see Tom drawing one as imperiously as he commands a crowd to kneel?

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That is a whole lot of regal.

 

3)      He’s played characters with Daddy issues.

 Read: Loki. And he does it so well. That perfect blend of defiance and vulnerability. He knows how to act abandoned and how to lash back. Admitted, Theon does it a lot less gracefully than Loki, but oh well, one’s a god.

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Heartbreak.

 

4)      He can do the bromance

 

Oh come now, we all know Theon and Robb have the greatest bromance in ASoIaF, not Jon and Robb. ‘Am I your brother, now and always?’ Theon demands when he swears loyalty to Robb, and with one curt nod, Robb affirms it.

Too bad things get so messed up later.

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That is an actual poster. There was no morphing.

 

Loki and Thor have a good relationship too, or did. This deleted scene from the first movie certainly seems to indicate that Loki bears his older brother no ill will. If only those other feelings hadn’t swum up…

 

5)      Because I really, really want to hear what he’d make of that epic line.

 ‘I wanted to be one of them.’

 I feel teary already.

Oh Tom. If only you’d been hanging around that studio. I will console myself with the idea that in a perfect, parallel universe, you are doing a great job as poor, misunderstood Theon Greyjoy.

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We will always have our dreams.

 

 

 

 

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